OK, this whole 55 thing has some perks. Kroger and something called Pick ‘n Save have a monthly “seniors day” for customers who are 55 or older. Show a store loyalty card and get a 10% discount. Nice. Never mind that the closet Kroger is 698 miles away from my home in Minnesota. It’s good to know they are thinking of dudes like me.
Apparently, IHOP, Denny’s, and more have a 55+ menu, but I’m not falling for that one. A 55+ plus menu simply means a smaller portion size while saving a few nickels. I may be old, but I’m not dumb. Supposedly, I can get something called a “senior coffee.” This is where I feel slighted. How about dropping my large McDonald’s coke to 50 cents?
For whatever reasons 55, like many ages divisible by 5, has a romantic ring to it. You’re supposed to be something, do something, know something, and stop doing some things when you hit these numbers. I don’t know how much of that is true, but I have learned some things over the years, and I have some regrets, and there are things I’d do differently if I could roll back the calendar. Over the next few weeks, I’d like to share a few with you beginning with this lesson I’ve learned…
I don’t have to be right.
Admittedly, that’s really hard for me. I value words and accuracy. When I hear or read something that’s not correct, I want to correct it. I’m not talking about correcting errors related to the gospel or to the clear teaching of the Word of God. I’m talking about matters that could be answers to Jeopardy questions or facts ignored in the retelling of an event. I don’t have to be right about those things.
The change started about 18 months ago, but I wish I would have considered it much sooner. I had the opportunity but ignored it. I remember my mom calling me a “walking encyclopedia.” It wasn’t a term of endearment. As a kid and into my adult life, I corrected or informed others about things that just didn’t matter. I am confident it was more off-putting than I can appreciate. I suspect the practice was more self-serving than helpful.
I’d like to think grace is coming. Most of the time I can let poor pronoun use slide. I don’t have to defend my position on a topic with vigor because so what? I can listen to others reflect without correcting. I can scroll by a Facebook post I’d really enjoy engaging for the purpose of rectifying horrible reasoning or blatant misinformation. I don’t have to be right about those things, and honestly, I may not be right about those things.
It’s liberating not to have to be right, a feeling I haven’t previously known but one I wish I’d come to know before the age of 55. Proverbs 15:2 offers instruction, “The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly, but the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness.” There is a way to use knowledge in a good and helpful way. Conversely, there is a way to use knowledge that provides little help, actually contributing nothing of value to the hearer. I don’t want to be that kind of possessor and dispenser of knowledge. I don’t have to be right.
An older relative of mine would opine, “You live and learn.” As we age, we hope we learn about ourselves and apply the corrective of God’s Word to those areas time has revealed need to change.
I’ve got to a run. There’s a 55-plus condo open house I need to hit.
Mike VerWay
Pastor for Preaching & Vision